Peter Rollins - the Devil's bile drips from your fangs!

Emergent Lovechild - Peter Rollins held a Create-your-own-Emergent -parable contest on his website - the winning Parable can be found here: 

http://peterrollins.net/?p=481

I would call it  Emergent Footprints in the Sand: I'm sure all our audience is familiar with the classic (overly sentimental) Footprints poem which basically says Jesus carries you when you're not able to continue following along side Him. 

This Emergent version basically says - your life is like footprints on the beach sometimes 2 sets (you and Jesus walking together) and other times 1 set. BUT here's where it does the Heresy 2-step - that's a theological dance Liberals practice where you start with a known topic or parable or doctrine people are familiar with like Heaven or Hell or The GOD-man Christ Jesus or Substitutionary Atonement then you redefine the terms so that they no longer mean what Christians have meant for the last 2000+ years and then you create your own version. This is why Emergents & Liberals don't worship Yahweh they worship Your-Way! Like Burger-King you can have your own "new kind of Christianity" just by redefining any cardinal doctrine that you don't like. This is Idolatry - Worshiping a god you made up with your imagination vs Worshiping the God that actually exists and reveals Himself to us through His Word both the incarnate Word, the Messiah Yeshua of Nazareth (Jesus Christ) and the Word of God (the Bible) - PS Idolaters go to the Hell that God actually Created that they don't actually believe in - just a quick FYI for you. 

So what do Emergents mean by 1 set of footprints in the sand   do they mean "Jesus carries you when you're not able to continue following along side Him" - NO -  well I could explain it theologically but let's just here it in there own blasphemous words:

And slowly God replied, his voice shaking with emotion. ‘The years when you have seen only one set of footprints, my child, is when you carried me.’

The man frowned for a moment, paused, and then looked up. ‘Surely Lord,’ he began rather embarrassed to be correcting the Almighty, ‘you mean when you carried me.’

‘My dear child,’ God said, twisting a loose thread of cloth from his flowing robes, his face suddenly a mirror in which the old man saw the battles he had fought and the doubts he had put asunder, ‘this was the measure of your faith: when difficulties came, you gathered up this tired and arthritic God, and carried your beliefs to safety.’

A small wind blew through the old photographs and worn papers, and the two men sat in silence for a moment.

‘I have prepared a room for you,’ God said after a while, ‘though I quite understand if you don’t want me to stay.

The god of Emergent Theology sounds so different (like a big pussy really) because he is a different god. They don't believe in the God of the Bible - that's why they are such popular book sellers they are too busy inventing a new religion with a new god, and a new Geezus (phonetically Jesus), a new gospel with a new "green" commission-  that they don't have time for THE GOD of THE BIBLE.

So the Parable - blasphemous - Yes; Christian - No!

To put this in perspective for any Non-christians reading, this would be like a pastor Sunday walking up to the pulpit (wait- American Churches don't have pulpits anymore) so the pastor walks up to the rock & roll-entertainment-stage-area and opens his Bible, drops his pants and takes a big dump on the Word of God - that is the theological equivalent of this parable.